David Wright is a Douchebag.


“The Captain” doesn’t have much meaning to most of us.

I have zero respect for David Wright. I’d tell him that to his face too. As far as most Phillies fans are concerned, it’s nice that he hits some home runs at our stadium, we appreciate the entertainment, but Wright is just another 2007-2008 Mets choke-artist. Nobody said he isn’t a talented baseball player, or even that he’s necessarily a rotten human being. I mean, I won’t accuse him of being Jose Reyes, Carlos Beltran, or Paul Lo Duca. I’m just saying David Wright isn’t a winner, so I don’t respect him.

Even if he’s not a rotten guy, I don’t like David Wright. David Wright is a douchebag. It’s not just that he’s a Met, though that adds to it. It’s that he tries to keep himself above the fray, with a passive aggressive style to his comments. After Saturday night’s “Utley slide” play, he whined like an angsty teenager, acting like Chase Utley has purposefully went out and tried to hurt players in the past, talking about the “players” that Utley apparently went after. Even after his untrue, gutless rant about that, he still wouldn’t man up and say he felt Utley tried to hurt Ruben Tejada. Instead he went with his regular passive aggressive crap, and said to “ask Chase.” That’s a douche answer.

That’s not the only time though we’ve seen this side of Wright. After Cole Hamels called the Mets “choke artists,” David Wright played his “above the fray” act then too. He told the New York Daily News at the time “It doesn’t matter. I’m not going to get in the middle of talking back and forth.” Being a coward in the face of a direct challenge in sports is probably the most douchey thing possible. It’s his norm though. He gave us another example of what a douche he is in September after an exchange with Freddie Freeman:

David said any jawing with Freddie Freeman Wednesday night was all in good fun, even if television cameras caught Wright appearing to launch an expletive at the Braves slugger in the seventh inning, when Wright hit an RBI single to tie the game.

“I have animated conversations with a lot of people. It’s fun to kind of get that competitiveness back and forth. I wasn’t expecting to see him tonight. He comes off the bench and kills us again,” said Wright. “I am angry at him. He hit a two-run double and then a three-run homer. But more in a playful way. Freddie and I go back and forth every now and then.”

Wright said he didn’t even look at Freeman in the ninth, after his three-run homer buried the Mets. “I had already been disgusted with him at that point,” Wright said.

This is douchebag material to the infinity degree. You had a problem with Freddie Freeman. Everybody watching the game saw you have that problem. You try and act like you’re above that though after the game. You “don’t even look at” him after he beats your team. There’s no more douchey behavior than that. Even Richard Sherman and Tom Brady made sure to seek each other out at the end of the Super Bowl, after a lengthy, public verbal sparring. Sherman is a man though, so of course he did.

You see though, I get why Wright is like this. Let’s go back a few years, to 2007. This was Wright’s attempt at a response to Jimmy Rollins before the 2007 season:

I read in the paper that Jimmy Rollins thinks nobody else has a chance…When you read that, it irks you a bit and makes you wanna go out there and beat them that much more.

First off, he’s not good at verbal sparring, which is fine. Second off, he lays that egg of a statement out there, and then Rollins made good on his smack-talk. That had to burn a bit. It clearly convinced him by the time Hamels taunted the Mets to back off. Hence, we now get this douchey, cowardly, dishonest version of Wright who pretends that he’s above these verbal spats and gamesmanship. We know better though. We know better because on the field, Wright is just like any other athlete. Just ask Freddie Freeman.

That’s fine though, Wright would hardly be the only douchebag in sports. It’s hardly a crime, and he might very well be a nice guy off the field. I think the thing that seals my hatred of the New York Mets’ captain is the way their fans defend him. It borderlines on fanatical, and isn’t based on anything. They just want it to be true though, so they say unsubstantiated things:




What in the flying hell are these folks talking about? Don’t know, don’t care that much. I can tell you that lots of Phillies fans, Yankee fans, Nationals fans, Braves fans, and I’m sure others would refer to Wright as a douchebag. Again, this hardly means we should compare him to historical monsters or even call him a rotten guy. What it means is that he’s just like every other player on the field that runs their over-confident mouths and has some altercations. A lot of these guys are also douchebags. We’re mostly willing to call them that though. Mets fans live in an alternative reality with Wright though. One where he should have won the 2007 MVP from Rollins. Yes, really. Some of this stuff is the grossest misuse of sabermetrics I’ve ever seen, but that aside, this is where Mets fans are about their “captain.” I mean, there’s even this priceless rationalization for why Wright can’t be a douchebag.

I’m 100% glad that Mets Blog and ESPN and the other outlets here reported on Wright being a sterling humanitarian and taking time to console a grieving child who lost his dad. I respect his support of the NYPD too. Many players who are called douchebags by other teams’ fans do great things in the community. Take for instance what the Mets fans say about their nemesis, Chase Utley:


I left out people that literally said they wanted Utley killed or badly injured tonight, because frankly that’s over the top and colors decent Mets fans in a negative light they don’t deserve. The point is that they find Chase Utley the baseball player to be a douchebag. That same guy, off the field is an active animal lover, raising money for the SPCA, appearing in ads to encourage people to adopt dogs. He has a foundation for it in fact, with his wife. He’s been active in the Philadelphia community- like Wright is in New York. I get that Mets fans like one, and not the other. That’s fine. Don’t pretend you have better reasons though.


Mets fans just desperately want Wright to be to them what Jeter, Mo, Posada, and Pettitte were to the Yankees, what Ortiz and Pedroia are to the Red Sox, or what Rollins, Utley, Howard, and Hamels are to the Phillies. He isn’t though. i’m not saying none of them are douchebags, but they all have titles in their cities. Maybe the young guys will finally carry Wright to one in 2015, you never know, but they will still have had to live through a career where his best years were wasted on underachieving and/or bad baseball teams. Wright missed a large chunk of this season, and isn’t really one of the keys to the Mets successes.

All of this aside- David Wright is a douchebag to me, but he’s had a great career. He’s a good ballplayer. He’s been an able rival. He’s just a douchebag. While Mets’ fans are up on their soapbox, rambling about moral high ground, let us not forget about their past. Let’s not forget about Paul Lo Duca’s trash talk, Johan Santana’s trash talk, Jose Reyes being an annoying twit, Carlos Beltran’s trash talk, the annoyance known as K-Rod, or the trap house that doubled as the locker room for the 1986 Mets. In fact, no. Let’s not forget about “quiet little David,” who always is polite with what he says. And does. Always.

Like this:


Yup. David Wright. Pillar of the game. Humanitarian. Never would come into second base hard. Never.

Complete and utter douchebag.


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